Thursday, May 29, 2008

And it only took eleven months

You know what's pretty remarkable? If Mitch Kupchak and Danny Ainge were fired in the offseason, the NBA would be looking at another Spurs-Pistons series, which would probably be the least-watched Finals of all time. And yet, Ainge and Kupchak pulled off the two best trades in the league, and the team's they work for are the Celtics and Lakers, the two most storied franchises in the NBA.

Who could have seen it coming? In November, Kobe Bryant appeared to be done in Los Angeles. He was booed when he stepped on the floor at the Staples Center, he didn't have enough around him, his team was mediocre. But then, Andrew Bynum blossomed into a star and Mitch Kupchak received Pau Gasol in a trade for Kwame Brown.

The Celtics were the second-worst team in the NBA. At one point, they lost 18 games in a row. In the offseason, Ainge swapped almost every Celtic who wasn't Paul Pierce and received Kevin Garnett and Ray Allen. Eddie House, James Posey, Scot Pollard, Glen Davis, P.J. Brown, and Sam Cassell jumped on board, and the C's won 66 games.

The Boston Celtics are a win away from giving the league it's best Finals matchup in the post-Jordan era. If and when they beat the Pistons, there'll be a lot of celebrating at the league's New York headquarters. If ABC can't pull massive ratings with these two teams...

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2/26/2004 - The Bartman ball gets destroyed

In Game 6 of the NLCS, the Chicago Cubs were five outs away from ending almost a century worth of misery. A fly ball into the left field stands was within Moises Alou’s grasp and was going to bring Chicago within 12 strikes of advancing to the World Series. But then… Steve Bartman interfered. Donning a swastika and a Snidely Whiplash mustache, the evildoer shoved several infants out of the way as he made his way towards the ball. With Alou’s glove extended, the felon brandished his dagger and hacked off Alou’s arm, glove and all, causing the ball to drop. With his task complete, Bartman jumped over the left-field wall and into his 1920 coal-powered engine, where he headed back to his evil lair.

The Cubs then proceeded to blow the lead, and the rest is history. Okay that first paragraph was exaggerated, but the rest is true.

A few months later, restaurant owner Grant DePorter bought the ball for $113,824.16 in an auction from the man who gathered it after it fell into the stands. DePorter purchased it on behalf of the Harry Caray Restaurant for whom he is the manager. The ball was on display for a few weeks before DePorter realized what had to be done; the only way the Cubs were ever going to win again was if the Bartman ball was destroyed. The ball was obviously a symbol of the Billy Goat Curse that had kept the Cubs from the World Series for almost 60 years.

"It's like the ring from The Lord of the Rings and we’re kind of like Frodo, trying to get it over with," DePorter said.

So on February 26, 2004, outside the Harry Caray Restaurant in downtown Chicago, the Bartman ball was displayed for the last time. Shortly before its demise (I’m not kidding about this either), the ball was given a last meal of steak, lobster, beer, and was administered a massage (???). There before several hundred slightly deranged Cubs fans, the baseball was electrocuted into submission, leaving nothing but a heap of string behind.

DePorter thought he had given the Cubs an uninhibited path to the World Series. However that very season, the Cubs lost 7 of their final 9 games to relinquish the Wild Card to the Houston Astros. The curse lived on. With the Bartman ball little more than a bundle of yarn, it now seemed that DePorter’s efforts weren’t quite over -- the ball’s remnant’s would have to be disposed of too.

Almost a year after the ball was destroyed, Harry Caray’s Restaurant announced that what was left of the ball was to be ground up and served on spaghetti. Soaked in Budweiser and vodka (of course), "Foul Ball Spaghetti" was dished out to 746 Cub fans hoping to do their part in vanquishing the curse. The restaurant actually hired a team of scientific advisers to concoct the best way to make the perfect curse-breaking sauce. One of the hires was David Harter, whose company "Sports Curse Laboratory" apparently specialized in prevention, detection, and elimination of sports curses (I bet that job pays well).

Yet here we are years later and the Cubs are still losing. But with even the remainders of the ball gone, what more is there to do? I suppose the next logical step would be to hunt down and assassinate the people who ate the ball. Then if the losing continued, you could burn their bodies and toss their ashes into outer space.

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Wednesday, May 28, 2008

6/01/2007 - Phillip Wellman goes nutso



When AA Mississippi Braves pitcher Kelvin Villa was ejected for using a foreign substance, manager Phillip Wellman came out to challenge. After being tossed himself for yelling in the home plate umpire's face, he heads to the diamond and kicks dirt on it, then draws out the ump's strike zone. Wellman then makes his case to the third base ump and walks off with the third base. By this point he's completely forgotten why he’s upset and is continuing for the sake of theater, which draws no complaints from the minor league audience.

After heaving the base into the outfield, he belly-crawls like a soldier to the pitcher's mound and launches the rosin bag ala a grenade. At last he uproots 2nd base, picks up 3rd, and walks out to a standing ovation (from the road crowd mind you). All in all, the tirade was less sporadic rage and more sheer absurdity. It would earn Wellman a 3-game suspension and plenty of Internet notoriety.

Personally, I believe the tirade was his way of protecting Villa. A Double-A pitcher struggling to make his way to the majors, being caught cheating could decimate his chances of ever making it to the big leagues. By going on an extensive over-the-top rant, Wellman diverted the spotlight off his pitcher and onto himself. And really, it's hard to complain with anything that makes a minor league baseball game watchable.

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Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Celtics have many concerns for Game 5

If the Boston Celtics go on and win the NBA championship, they will do it looking more mortal than ever before. The team that meshed so well in the regular season has a lot of issues going into Game 5, a game they absolutely need to win. Otherwise, the Pistons could be looking at a Finals berth.

For one thing, Sam Cassell has not lived up to his reputation. Other than Game 1 against the Cavaliers, Cassell has played dreadful; it could mean Eddie House becomes the permanent backup to Rajon Rondo, or we may see all three in a game, and whoever plays the best finishes it.

Then there's Ray Allen. Allen had a great regular season and showed up time and again when they needed a clutch three. But he has completely disappeared in the postseason, and like Sam Cassell, Doc Rivers may have to shelve him down the stretch. If he has another terrible game, playing James Posey ahead of him in the 4th quarter may be necessary.

Besides working out the rotation, and figuring out whether Leon Powe should be in instead of Glen Davis or if House should replace Cassell, the Celtics' key to victory seems to hinder on two things: the play of Rajon Rondo, and their defense. In their two wins, Rondo shot 5-10 for 12 points and 5-9 for 11 points. In their two losses, Rondo went 2-9 for 10 points and 2-8 for 4 points. Defensively, they allowed 79 and 80 points in their two wins. In their losses, they allowed 94 and 103. If Boston can limit the score and get good point guard play, they should win Game 5.

If the Boston Celtics win the championship, they'll break the '94 Knicks record for 24 playoff games played (Boston has already played 18). They've already lost 8 times, which is three shy of the playoff record as well. This is not the unstoppable juggernaut we anticipated in July, rather it's a very good team that has been pushed farther than any team in history. Even if they beat the Pistons, a more formidable Western team is around the corner.

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Monday, May 26, 2008

4/19/2008 - Duncan tres, Ginobili layup beat Suns

The Western Conference was never deeper than it was in 2008. All eight playoff teams won at least 50 games, while the #9 Golden State Warriors won 48 games. The conference was so packed that the Phoenix Suns, who were just two games out from first place, finished with the #6 seed. In doing so, they were reacquainted with the San Antonio Spurs -- who had beaten them the year before on a dubious suspension -- in the first round.

Game 1 proved to be one of the greatest playoff games to ever open a series. The Phoenix Suns were in control almost the entire way. Even with Shaquille O'Neal battling foul trouble, the Suns led by 16 in the first half and 9 early in the 4th quarter.

But the Spurs battled back, and trimmed it to a three-point deficit with under a minute to play. Phoenix relinquished the ball on their second-to-last possession with a shot clock violation, giving the Spurs an opportunity to tie the game. With 15.1 seconds left, Michael Finley curled off a screen and nailed his third three-pointer of the period, tying the score at 93. Leandro Barbosa, who was guarding Finley, missed a floater as time expired, which sent the game into overtime.

In OT, Steve Nash and Amare Stoudemire scored all 11 of the Suns' points. A Stoudemire layup with 1:08 remaining put the Suns in command with a 5-point lead. But the four-time champion Spurs still had their trump card. Tim Duncan had maybe the finest game of his career, and finished with 40 points, 15 rebounds, 5 assists, and 3 blocks on 16-24 shooting. He cut the lead to three with a leaner over Shaq.

Then, with time running down, Manu Ginobili was doubled when he drove to the lane. Manu passed it out to the top of the key, where Duncan was all alone at the three-point line. Tim hesitated for a moment, but with only a handful of seconds remaining, he launched it from twenty-three feet away. The shot was nothing but nylon, and it tied the game at 104. It was Duncan's first three-pointer of the season, and it couldn't have come at a more convenient time.

"I didn't know what was going to happen, honestly," Duncan said. "Manu turned the corner, Shaq just totally leaves me and stayed with Manu. I got a wide-open shot. Wound it up. Threw it up there and hoped for the best."

A desperation fade-away by Boris Diaw was no good, and the game went on.

With the added momentum of Duncan's triple, and with Amare Stoudemire having fouled out, the Spurs at last seized a lead in double overtime. Ginobili and Duncan entered the paint at will, and the 36 year-old O'Neal had difficulty stopping them.

The Spurs held their largest lead of the game with 19.5 ticks left. Down only three, the Suns inbounded the ball to Diaw. Nash raced over to the strong side of the floor, got the ball from Diaw, and fired a miraculous off-balanced three that somehow found the bottom of the net.

Spurs coach Greg Popavich elected to not call timeout. Ginobili brought the ball up the court and waited as the clock trickled down. Manu then blew past Raja Bell, who received no help defense from O'Neal or Diaw. Ginobili banked in the game-winning shot, as the Suns had run out of timeouts. A seventy-foot airball from Nash ended one of the wildest games ever, and had the Phoenix sideline lamenting over the loss.

"We had the game won a few times and just weren't tough enough or disciplined enough to make every single play when it counted," said Nash.

"They know we let them have one," Shaq said. "All we need is one in this building."

Suns coach Mike D'Antoni was left to defend his decision to not foul when they were up three in the 4th quarter and overtime. "God knows if there is a sure-fire way of winning the game, let’s do it. But I’ve been around the game long enough ... it just doesn’t work that way. I know there will be fans out there groaning. Let them go to the Y and work on it." "I’m willing to take the gamble on Tim Duncan, who hasn’t made a 3-pointer in two years. If it’s Ray Allen or Brent Barry, okay, foul the sucker, because they’re not missing. But it wasn’t."

Many analysts were quick to call the series the greatest to ever happen in the first round. However, the Spurs made relatively quick work of the Suns. They won the next game by six and annihilated Phoenix in Game 3. The Spurs won the series 4-1, making it four straight times the Suns had lost to them in the playoffs.

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Sunday, May 25, 2008

5/14/2007 - Cheap shot Rob burns Suns



Of all the late-game heroics in Robert Horry's career, only once did it not involve shooting the basketball.

In Game 4 of the Western Semis, the Suns staged a furious comeback to tie the Spurs at two games apiece and regained control of the series. Their victory came at a cost though. With 18.2 seconds remaining in the game, Horry slammed Nash into the scorer's table. Raja Bell jumped into Horry's face and the teams scuffled for a few seconds.

The call was a flagrant foul and Horry was ejected. The Suns hit their free throws and closed out the game. However, replays showed both Boris Diaw and Amare Stoudemire, who were on the bench at the time, stepping (albeit briefly) onto the court. Both Diaw and Stoudemire were suspended the following day, while Horry was given a two-game reprieve.

The ruling sparked a myriad of outrage from everyone outside the state of Texas. Most columnists agreed that removing Stoudemire and Diaw rewarded Horry's actions instead of punishing them. There was an outpouring of pleas to change the instant-suspension rule for leaving the bench during an altercation, while the league had initiated to stop whole teams from joining brawls. Those cries went unheard, and the Suns were forced to play on.

In Game 5, the Suns' eight-man rotation was trimmed to six thanks to the suspensions. Bell played 47 minutes, while Nash and Shawn Marion played 46. Phoenix held a 16-point lead early in the game and led by 8 with under six minutes to go. Whether it was a lack of stamina from their starters playing the whole game or the Spurs stopped feeling bad about playing them at half-strength, San Antonio turned on the afterburners. A Bruce Bowen three with under a minute to go broke an 85-85 tie and gave the Spurs a 3-2 series lead.

Phoenix got Amare back for Game 6, but winning a closeout game in San Antonio after playing their other starters huge minutes was too much to ask. The Spurs dominated the third quarter and won the game by eight. They then beat the Utah Jazz in the Conference Finals and swept the Cavaliers in the NBA Finals. Horry, who in his 15th year had fallen out of the rotation, rarely got on the court. Yet in about two seconds, his foul sent the Suns packing.

In the offseason, it was revealed that 14-year referee Tim Donaghy had bet on games he officiated. Donaghy was one of the men calling Game 3 of the Spurs-Suns series; the Spurs won that game, though many writers were critical that the calls clearly favored San Antonio.

With that discovery, each one of the Spurs' victories over Phoenix were in question. In Game 1, Nash did not re-enter the game in the closing minutes because the trainers couldn't stop his nose bleeding (he had bumped heads with Tony Parker). Game 3 was almost-literally rigged, the Suns were without Stoudemire in Game 5, and were too exhausted in Game 6.

The Spurs and Suns met again in the postseason in 2008. Vengeance, unfortunately, was not served. Too bad, because the 2007 Spurs-Suns series was as unfulfilling a playoff series as there's ever been.

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Saturday, May 24, 2008

It's time for Boston to prove their mettle

For the first time in the postseason, the Boston trio of Allen, Garnett, and Pierce each scored 20 points. And for the first time this postseason, the Celtics lost at home. They've lost all six road games so far, and will need at least one at the Palace if they want to beat Detroit.

Splitting the first two games of a series is natural for most Conference Finals. The 2000 67-win Lakers split their first two games against the Blazers, then won back-to-back games in Portland. But for the Celtics, splitting the first two means a little bit more. It means they'll have to do something they haven't done in over a month: win on the road.

Still, there's no reason for the Celtics to worry. Ray Allen finally broke out of his horrid slump and scored 25 the other night. Sam Cassell is sure to make a reappearance, though it will be the kiss of death for Tony Allen. They were the best road team in the regular season, and won in Utah, Los Angeles, Dallas, Houston, San Antonio, and Detroit. This entire season has been a celebration of the Celtics' reemergence; now they have two games to prove it wasn't just a puff of smoke. If LeBron James can single-handedly beat the Pistons, the Big 3 should be able to do it too.

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Friday, May 23, 2008

11/06/2000 - The Improbable Bobble

A classic rivalry game between the Packers and Vikings ended with maybe the greatest catch ever aired on Monday Night football.

With the rain pouring the entire way, the Vikings were on the verge of sealing the victory. It was a tied game, and Minnesota needed only a 33-yard field goal from Hall of Fame kicker Gary Anderson to go home with the win. But after Green Bay called a timeout to ice Anderson, the precipitation had taken its course.

On the snap, holder/punter Mitch Berger couldn't secure the ball cleanly. With the seconds ticking off the clock, Berger desperately flung it towards the end zone where it was intercepted by Tyrone Williams. Time expired and the game went to overtime.

"If I wasn't an idiot, I would have spiked the ball to get another shot at it," Berger said afterwards. Minnesota was only on their third down and they would have had three seconds to try another field goal. "For some reason, it didn't cross my mind."

After winning the coin toss, Green Bay's streak of serendipity won them the game. On 3rd and 4 from the Vikings 43, Brett Favre lobbed it to Antonio Freeman, who was trying to elude Chris Dishman down the right side of the field. Freeman slipped on the wet grass and began to fall; the football went through Dishman's hands and hit Freeman's left shoulder right as he hit the ground. The ball bounced to the Packer receiver's right arm where it ricocheted into his chest. Dishman never touched him, thinking that the play was dead. When Freeman saw that it was ruled a catch, he stood up and raced into the end zone.

"The ball was changing trajectory all night. It affected our receivers. It affected their defender on that play," Freeman said. "Dishman made a good play. It hit his right hand and his shoulder pad as I fell back."

Al Michaels call of the game-winning TD fit what many fans were thinking: "He did what!?"

Freeman redeems himself with "Improbable Bobble"
The Ratings Don't Tell The Story On Monday

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Wednesday, May 21, 2008

5/22/2003 - Annika plays in men's tourney

As tremendous a golfer as Tiger Woods was, there was a time when many thought Annika Sorenstam was just as, if not more dominant. In 2002, Sorenstam won 13 of the 25 LPGA events she competed in. She had won five Player of the Year awards, once shot a 59 in a single round, and was the best woman on the tour by miles.

Annika mania reached its apex when she accepted an offer to play at the Colonial Invitational in Fort Worth, Texas. The Colonial was a men's-only PGA tournament; a woman had not competed on a PGA course in 58 years, when Babe Didrikson Zaharias played in the 1945 Los Angeles Open.

As much coverage as her recent excellence brought her, it was miniscule to the hype surrounding her appearance at the Colonial. ''I want to play with the best guys in the world," she said. "I know I'm going to be nervous, but that's all part of the challenge. I just want to play my best game. Then I'll get a true test of where I stand against (the men).''

Sorenstam received an overwhelming show of support from golfers both male and female. Tiger Woods and Phil Mickelson were on board with it, as was President Bush, who said, "I hope she makes the cut." There were some who weren't as objective however. Nick Price, who was the defending champion at the Colonial, called it a publicity stunt and said she should've qualified for the tournament instead of accepting a sponsor's exemption. Vijay Singh, who was one of the top-ten golfers in the world, said "I hope she misses the cut. Why? Because she doesn't belong out here. If I'm drawn with her, which I won't be, I won't play."

Both golfers, particularly Singh, were crucified by the media. Price grudgingly relented by stating, "She's a great gal." Singh apologized as well, but pulled out of the tournament less than a week before tee-off, claiming that he needed a break after playing in four straight tournaments. As you can imagine, his excuse did not go over well.

Sorenstam's presence was immediately evident when she began her first round on Thursday. It was uncommon to see a tournament without Tiger Woods so abundant with photographers and reporters. Many of the spectators wore "Go Annika!" pins and frequently shouted encouragingly to her.

In her first round, Annika shot a one-over 71. She was ahead of Sergio Garcia, Geoff Oglivy, Stuart Apleby, and Tom Lehman, and was tied with Nick Price. She was seven strokes behind the leader, but was only one stroke from making the cut.

Her second round wasn't nearly as successful. Sorenstam shot a 74 and finished five strokes behind the cut line. She had chosen the Colonial over other PGA events because of its emphasis on accuracy rather than physical strength. Ironically, Sorenstam was stellar on the fareway and was among the leaders in driving accuracy. Yet she was awful on the green and missed a lot of putts that could have advanced her to the third round.

''I've climbed as high as I can,'' Sorenstam said. ''And it was worth every step. I won't do this again, but I'll always remember this."

It's a matter of opinion whether or not Annika's glimpse with the men was a gain for women's athletics. On the one hand, she proved that the length of a PGA course wasn't prohibitive to her and that she could have made the cut had her putting been better. On the other hand, she did not make the cut and she finished 96th out of the field of 113.

Two months later, Suzy Whaley competed in the Greater Hartford Open. With little to no fanfare following in Sorenstam's footsteps, Whaley shot a 78 in the second round and missed the cut. A few years later, super-prodigy Michelle Wie joined the list of women to compete against the men. Wie would play in four PGA tournaments before she even turned 17, and didn't make the cut in any of them. To date, the only woman to make the cut in a PGA event was Babe Zaharias, more than 60 years ago. But to be fair, less than a handful have tried.

Sorenstam says all the right things

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Monday, May 19, 2008

5/05/2004 - MLB announces Spiderbase ads

I'm sure by now many of you forgot baseball’s most regrettable foray in the world of advertising. Four years ago, MLB reached a deal with Columbia Pictures to advertise "Spiderman 2" during interleague games from June 11-13. In the tie-in, no marketing device was more noteworthy and perceived horrible than the image above: an actual red Spiderman web right on the center of the base that would be used in the games.

Needless to say, the baseball purists were outraged and managed to get the base-ads removed within a week. The world can do without another advertisement. Though with the popularity of NASCAR and the development of 3D, I’m sure less evasive ads will eventually find their way to the ballpark.

MLB, Sony Scale Back Spider-Man 2 Promotion

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Saturday, May 17, 2008

ESPN poll: 49 states want Hornets over Spurs

In a recent SportsNation poll, ESPN asked America who they would rather see in the Western Conference Finals: the Hornets or the Spurs. 49 of the 50 states voted for the Hornets, leaving Texas -- where the Spurs play -- as the exception. And by the way, 47% of the Texans voted that they'd rather see the Hornets.

Let's face it, there are many reasons to hate the San Antonio Spurs. Manu Ginobili is an incredible flopper and argues every call, just like Tim Duncan and Kurt Thomas. Every Tony Parker reference is immediately followed by a shot of Eva Longoria. The games they play are boring and uninteresting (hell, just look at the first six games of this series) unless they play an exciting team like Phoenix. And finally, they've won it already. Four times to be exact.

America has had enough of the Spurs. It's time to let another more interesting, more exciting team into the Finals. Let's hope three days rest will be enough for David West. Even if you hate the Hornets, root for New Orleans as a fan of basketball. A Spurs-less NBA Finals is assured to be watchable.

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Lakers are now the team to beat

Heading into Game 6, the LA Lakers could've resigned against the Utah Jazz. In a playoff round where the home team won all but one of the 21 games played, the Jazz had the best home record in the league. But LA did not rely on a Game 7 at home; they crushed the Jazz and led by double-digits until the last minute.

Meanwhile, the Boston Celtics look vulnerable for the first time all season. Ray Allen has become invisible, Sam Cassell fell out of the rotation, and last night, Rajon Rondo was outplayed by Eddie House. Cleveland had just 10 assists last night, but the LeBron James show was still enough to give the Cavs the win. Boston now heads to their second consecutive Game 7, and while they should be favored, it's only a matter of time until they get burned.

Factoring in the Celtics inability to win on the road and the Lakers control of the Jazz, Los Angeles is now the team to beat. Now that Kobe Bryant has a legitimate cast around him, it seems like a foregone conclusion that they'll reach the Finals. The Celtics will have to struggle just to slip away from Detroit.

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Monday, May 12, 2008

6/25/2006 - Mikulik Disagrees With A Call



In a game between the single-A Asheville Tourists and the Lexington Legends, Koby Clemens (Roger Clemens' son) was called safe on a bang-bang play at third base. Tourists manager Joe Mikulik went out to challenge the call and was promptly ejected. After that, Mikulik went just a tad overboard.

Gotta love the background music too. Nothing like seeing a manger go ape to the tune of Abbot & Costello, A Few Good Men, and Marry Poppins. Mikulik is the Tourists all-time wins leader, but who cares when you got footage like this.

Minor league manager loses cool, fined, suspended

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Sunday, May 11, 2008

D'Antoni chose profit over prosper

Mike D'Antoni was the mastermind behind the Phoenix Suns and made them a contender for four years. However, the trade that swapped Shawn Marion for Shaquille O'Neal didn't work, and D'Antoni was a good soldier about it through the regular season. But now that they've lost in the first round, D'Antoni has leapt from the sinking ship that is the Suns onto the trash barge that is the New York Knicks.

D'Antoni could've gone to the Chicago Bulls, who seemed to be a perfect fit for his style of basketball. They were only one year removed from making the postseason and are stocked with guards and athletic bigmen.

The Knicks, on the other hand, can't possibly be a good fit for D'Antoni. They're almost $50 million over the salary cap and are years and years from contention. The roster is loaded with lumbering bigmen like Zach Randolph, Eddy Curry, Malik Rose, and Jerome James. And their main guards (Stephon Marbury, Jamal Crawford, Nate Robinson) all seem to be adverse to listening to authority.

So then why? Why accept a job that is tailor-made for disaster? A cool $24 million is the answer. And that's fine, I can't say that the bait of a significantly larger salary wouldn't tempt me as well. However, karma is now against him. The same way Joe Johnson left the Suns to make big bucks in Atlanta and has yet to win anything, so will be the fate of D'Antoni in New York.

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Saturday, May 10, 2008

4/29/1983 - Lee Elia tells off Cubs fans

With a one-run loss to the LA Dodgers, Lee Elia's Chicago Cubs dropped to 5-14. The Wrigley crowd of 9,391 booed the entire way and Elia was left foaming at the mouth. When reporters gathered to collect his post-game thoughts, no one had any idea they were going to hear this:



If not for radio host Les Grobstein -- the lone man in the room with a tape recorder -- Elia's outburst would've faded into oblivion. Instead it became the enduring moment in Elia's 50-year baseball career.

"I made some comments that I don't even know how they came out of my mouth, because they were not comments that I normally would make,'' Elia later said. "Never in my wildest dreams did I think somebody would run out of there and put it on the air.'' Despite his brazen lambasting of the Cubs fans, Elia managed to hold on to his coaching job until August.

The following season, things got better, just as Elia predicted. Newcomers Rick Sutcliffe, Ryne Sandberg, and Dennis Eckersley got the Cubs into the postseason for the first time in 39 years. Lee Smith, whose game-losing wild pitch led to Elia's tirade, went on to record the most saves in history. And the Wrigley attendance, which barely reached 10,000 fans on a given day, rose exponentially. When the Cubs went back to their losing ways the next year, fans continued to pack the ballpark, and still do, regardless of how awful their team is. It took just one year for Wrigley Field to become a baseball shrine.

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Thursday, May 8, 2008

7/01/2006 - Matthews makes amazing catch

In 2001, Gary Matthews Jr. made the catch of the year in Major League Baseball. Then a Chicago Cub, Matthews slid for a baseball in center field. The ball popped out of the glove in his left hand and appeared to be a hit in-the-making. But at the last moment, Matthews extended his right arm back and grasped the ball in his fingertips. As great a play as that grab was, Matthews' catch in 2007 was probably better.

The Houston Astros were leading the Texas Rangers 5-0 in the top of the eighth. Mike Lamb -- who already had a double, a triple, and a home run -- was at the plate. A single would give him a cycle, but Lamb wanted a two-homer game instead. On a 3-1 pitch from Bryan Corey, Lamb blasted the ball to deep center field.

Matthews raced to the wall and jumped off his right foot. Elevating his glove a good three feet above the eight-foot outfield wall, Matthews caught the ball while barely getting a look at it, then spun back and landed on his left leg. And by doing so, he completely stole the headline from Lamb and the Astros.



"It's going to go on the highlights for a while, and it should," Lamb said. "It just stinks that it happened to me."

"That's the best one I've made so far," Matthews said. "It was hit high, so I knew I had a shot. You go back, pick a spot and hope it's the right one. It hit right in the pocket."

Matthews' catch was the star highlight from his 2006 All-Star season. Once a journeyman outfielder with the Padres, Cubs, Mets, and Orioles, Matthews had career-highs in batting, slugging, runs, hits, RBI, doubles, triples, and total bases. That offseason, the Anaheim Angels gave Matthews a 5-year $50 million deal in the hope that he would evolve into a five-tool slugger.

Three months after receiving his enormous deal, Matthews was linked in an Albany Times-Union article that exposed a pharmacy illegally supplying steroids. The store's clients included Matthews, Jose Canseco, and former heavyweight champion Evander Holyfield, whose buyer name was cryptically "Evan Fields." It took Matthews sixteen days to issue a statement saying, "I have never taken HGH," and in that time, all his credibility had been lost. He fell back to earth in 2007; his batting average dropped 61 points and his fielding percentage was the lowest of any American League center fielder. Later that year, Matthews was named in the Mitchell Report.

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Monday, May 5, 2008

Wanna get on TV? Go to a Marlins game!

If you read the story of William Ligue, the guy who attacked the Royals' first base coach, I know what a lot of you were thinking: "Hey, if that guy got all that attention, maybe I should do it too. I can get on TV and everything." Don't. Folks, if you really want to get on TV, don't act like that douchebag. Don't try to harm anyone. All you have to do is attend a Florida Marlins game. Seriously. This was what the crowd looked like when the Nationals played the Marlins on September 12, 2007:

And this was the crowd when the Pirates played the Marlins on April 6, 2008:

These photos aren't during warmups either, these are in-game pictures. So just buy a ticket, sit in the bleachers, and go nuts. The odds are REALLY good that you'll get on TV. Hold up a sign saying how much you love the announcers, take off your shirt and paint your chest, or sit in the outfield and catch the home run ball every time. The possibilities are endless!

Don't do anything unruly though. As the only fan in the park, you'll be pretty easy to identify.

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Saturday, May 3, 2008

9/19/2002 - Fans attack Tom Gamboa

The United States rarely accommodates the fan violence seen in some European countries. Over there, fans have rioted the field, thrown flares at the players, and have even been in altercations that resulted in multiple fatalities. American sports fans don't have nearly as bad a rap sheet, save for one night in September 2002.

The Kansas City Royals were leading the Chicago White Sox 2-1 in the ninth inning at US Cellular Field. That was when two shirtless men ran out of the stands and attacked Royals' first base coach Tom Gamboa. The Kansas City dugout leapt from their seats and separated the duo from the 54 year-old coach. The perpetrators were led out of the stadium and into a police vehicle; Gamboa suffered several cuts and bruises and left with permanent hearing damage to his right ear; an unfolded pocket knife was found at the scene.

The culprits were identified as 34 year-old William Ligue jr. and his 15 year-old son. As Ligue was being escorted out of the park, he told reporters, "(Gamboa) got what he deserved." He claimed that the first base coach had given them the bird and was taunting them throughout the game. "At no time, no matter how bad it got, have I ever made a hand gesture or verbally done anything to the fans," Gamboa said.

There was no evidence that Gamboa had done anything to provoke the Ligues -- which figured because it wasn't true. What was true was that the elder Ligue called his sister minutes before the assault and told her to turn on the TV.

"It's 15 minutes of fame for a no-name guy," Gamboa stated. "It's like I'm today's Kato Kaelin. Ten years from now, somebody will point to me and say 'That's the guy who was attacked.' Nobody likes to be remembered for that. I'd like to be appreciated for the job I do."

To his credit, Gamboa had spent 25 years as a minor league manager, and made it all the way to the big leagues as a base coach in 1998. However his portfolio could not eclipse what was the worst case of fan-athlete violence in the country's history.

Much like the psycho who stabbed Monica Seles in 1993, both the father and son got off with a very lenient sentence. The dad was given 30 months of probation and a 90-day curfew, while the son somehow received a longer probation sentence of five years. The dad was later given a five-year jail sentence for hijacking a car and leading the police on a chase, while the son was later charged with the shooting a 20 year-old man.

The Kansas City Royals didn't again play in Chicago until April of the next year. When they did visit, the seemingly-isolated case of a couple bad White Sox fans appeared to be becoming an epidemic. On four occasions, a fan ran onto the field and delayed the baseball game. In the last occurrence, a drunken spectator jumped onto the field and ran at umpire Laz Diaz. The fan later admitted that he did it merely to upstage the three previous idiots.

Diaz was in far better condition than Gamboa to defend himself. The ex-Marine handled the trespasser easily -- with the help of several of the players -- and the fan left with a gash on his head and blood splattered on his t-shirt. Adding insult to injury, he was later given six months of jail time.

The incidents at US Cellular Field razed some valid questions about Major League Baseball. Is there enough security to properly ensure the players' safety? Why isn't there a strict limit on the amount of alcohol that can be purchased at a ballpark? And is there a point when unruly fans have to be ejected before they do something like this?

On a side note, September 19th turns out to be a somewhat historic day for violent lunatics. On September 19, 1881, president James Garfield died -- it was 79 days after the assassination attempt by Charles Guiteau. And on September 19, 1995, the Unabomber had his Manifesto published in the New York Times and Washington Post.

See also: Wanna get on TV? Go to a Marlins game!

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Thursday, May 1, 2008

2/14/1990 - Air Jordan wears #12

Michael Jordan wore more than 23 and 45 in his career: for one game he was #12. One Valentine's Day, MJ's number 23 uniform was stolen minutes before tip-off against the Orlando Magic. In the absence of a backup, Sam Vincent loaned Jordan his jersey for the night. Jordan scored 49 points although his Bulls still lost in overtime 135-129.

To me, this was sort of bizarre because you'd think Michael Jordan would have carried more than one jersey with him. Also, couldn't the Bulls have just gone to an athletic store, or bought one from someone a wearing a replica jersey in the crowd? Even now, locating someone with a Michael Jordan 23-jersey isn't all that hard.

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